The Sectarian Roadshow goes National on the BBC: And Turns Weird.

09 March 2011 23:57
Two contrasting ways of dealing with the issue from the national broadcaster. TELEVISION Viewers of Newsnight on Tuesday night were in for a rare treat. No, not just Jeremy Paxman talking to Noam Chomsky: the real highlight of proceedings was a discussion on Sectarianism in Scotland, in light of last week’s game and the ludicrous summit called by Fat Eck, from the Diddy Parliament. This wasn’t the usual Scottish opt-out, well not in the traditional sense. Viewers watching BBC Scotland were treated to a serious discussion about (insert Scottish Labour issue of the day) while those in London and surrounding places of import were the lucky ones: it was time for “Why is Scotland barely at the level of a medieval fiefdom?”, a popular item on any self-respecting metropolitan political news programme. And in the black(ish) chair, representing Scotland in the face of a grilling from the Grand High Inquisitor Paxman were A L Kennedy – Dundonian author exiled in civilisation (Glasgow)– and Joke McConnell: adulterer, failed First Minister and ennobled former Prime Ministerial Special Representative: the Malawi version of C3PO on Endor. At first glance you may wonder about the composition of this mini-panel. It’s probably for the best that of the two only Kennedy (not to be confused with the RSNO cellist cooking up a fine tuna on Masterchef X Factor) is a bookish sort – it lessens the likelihood that her previous comment on her fellow Scot would be taken as truly intended. “Leader Jack McConnell has a Willy Loman smile, dead eyes and a campaign based on rubbishing the SNP.” A L Kennedy, the Independent, April 8, 2007 After some small talk we begin with the obvious lob from JP: “Why doesn’t this problem exist in other places with significant Catholic elements?” A L Kennedy (in suspicious blue manly shirt): “(Dundonian).” (You’ll here have to accept the idea that Alison said anything of interest or relevance, apart from a strange notion of there being “labour families and BNP families” but then she’s not a great fan of the Unionist parties. Speaking in 2007 ahead of the Scottish election she offered this on the idea of the option of voting for such bodies: “And then we have the Unionist faction, with its worship of the union flag and it's tastefully expressed dislike of "multiculturalism". Depressed that Ireland got all that really exciting sectarianism during the 1970s and 80s, I can only assume that some of us do yearn for roadside kneecappings and pandemic, self-perpetuating loathing. Watch this space.”) http://www.independent.co.uk/opinion/commentators/a-l-kennedy-a-nation-again-so-what-is-eating-the-scots-443751.html Paxman then moved on from such pleasantries and presented the quite understandable question: “Isn’t this sort of thing (sectarianism and nuttery) more likely if you educate children separately?” Big Chief Bridie’s Man suggested: “Not necessarily...could be more likely now if you didn’t (have separate schools)” and slipped in the first mention of the ‘tradition’ of RC schools. Paxman then demonstrated a refreshing lack of familiarity with the BBC Pacific Quay handbook – “Did you not try as First Minister to break down this apartheid education?” African Hope: “We did!” He then mentioned a number of “joint-campuses” with shared facilities, although he neglected to mention to the UK-wide audience that many of them don’t allow the kids to enter or leave by the same door. Or, as in some areas, that the joint-campus idea really means that what was once a non-denominational site is now home to a refurbished and revamped super-sectarian factory of bigotry. Paxman (by now clearly puzzled): “Why have separate schools at all?” Poster Man for Over-Promotion: “It’s a tradition!” And it’s about “the quality of education in RC schools.” Jack was a teacher once in what now seems like a previous and other-worldy incarnation. You wonder, however, what he means by this "quality of education" and his other gem: “the success.” RC state secondary schools consistently fail to penetrate the lists of top Scottish schools; indeed most recent compilations have only two in the top fifty. So what is the “success” he speaks of, other than the mere existence of these symbolic instruments; acting as the only possible means of maintaining any sort of power in the social and political context of modern Scotland. Without their schools the RC church would be impotent in argument and purpose. Bridget wouldn’t like that, so like Achilles, on go the labours of Jack. RADIO Meanwhile, on BBC Radio Five Live this Wednesday morning, Nicky Campbell was all hot and bothered by the chance to discuss sectarianism in the West of Scotland, the IRA and the real baddies: clue, it’s not the IRA. Former SFA chief Gordon Smith was given an early-morning chance to speak to the nation before being passed over (without a goodbye or even as much as a cursory thank-you) in favour of Professor Tom Devine – “listen to Tom, he knows his stuff”, opined Nicky. And he does. What’s interesting about Devine is that – for all he is a Celtic fan and a Roman Catholic – he’s also a serious and intelligent man. As such we were treated to a short potted history of the problems between the two clubs, a fine reminder of the multi-religious nature of Irish immigration to Scotland from the nineteenth century and also the clear belief that in terms of sectarianism matters have improved in Scottish society and in terms of evidence it’s apparent that social problems of a religious nature are less endemic. Campbell managed to amuse and confuse with the idea that “Tims” is a hugely offensive insult but was clear that “Football is about loathing.” It was only the later phone-in that teased out his madness. After 9am (which perhaps acts as some form of mentalist watershed in radio terms?) came the calls, many of which were sensible, with some granting the host the chance to inform us of his opinion: which was and is that the IRA so beloved of the Celtic craicsters is a 1916 version (think Deep Purple with David Coverdale) and thus cuddly and political and in no way whatsoever to be confused with the sectarian murder-gangs who killed women, children but especially Protestant British citizens. http://www.independent.ie/opinion/analysis/the-ira-campaign-in-cork-against-protestants-and-nonrepublicans-was-on-a-truly-vast-scale-2417300.html As part of a box-ticking exercise (Hello, do we have a lie we can repeat? We do? Is it ludicrous? It is!) we were also treated to fantasies repeated about green Peperami incidents at Ibrox but that was a mere snack compared to the point of the sitting: to open wide and belch forth the Republican hot air. Nicky’s response to a woman who claimed embarrassment at her husband’s habit for singing Provo ditties was a revealing stage in the process of Campbell evolving from host into the bold Mick-Nick: denying the lady the right to such feelings he seemed to ache inside and wobbled audibly as he caressed the idea of the vocal love for the old country, contrasting beautifully with his snarling delivery of a Protestant song declaring its opposition to the Papal remedy and totality. One could imagine Campbell stroking his Lisbon replica jersey, all the while lamenting the fantasy of his biological father and grandfather’s involvement with the IRA (quite possibly still within the period of cuddles and non-sectarian motives which exist only in the minds of the deranged). That Campbell should be paid by us to offer such dangerous and decidedly anti-British feeling on a state-funded broadcaster may not surprise but it should never lose the power to shock and repulse. One doubts that a reading so sympathetic to Al-Qaeda would be permitted but perhaps that is best left for another day. Hopefully Nicky Campbell’s time will come: Although hopefully not in the Holiday Inn, Birmingham, where the blue plaque to signify the sin of Campbell’s infidelity is unlikely to make it to the latrine but stands more chance of being preserved for the nation than the signal of Campbell’s moral and mental disorder.

Source: FOOTYMAD