Rant: Why do some decisions seem more suitable for debate than others?

16 August 2011 14:21
It's time for Craig Thomson again and Vidmar's been let out of the special ward for a week. The rough elements of the Scottish press has always festered at the arse-end of the journalistic universe, but recent seasons have seen the notoriously unskilled flange of bunglers plumb new, toe-curling depths. Whilst many of their number will claim allegiance to a St Mirren or a Partick Thistle, the astute observer will notice any such alleged leanings are happily swatted aside to accommodate the overriding principle of Scottish press existence; one must favour, flatter and fellate Celtic Football Club at all cost.Celtic of course, are the ginger stepchild of the footballing world; broken and desperate for acceptance they’ll make moves which give some the impression they are happy to exploit the deaths of innocents and even their own to further their own lunatic agenda. As downright deviant as that may seem, they’ll also resort to intimidation of anybody if they feel it’ll benefit their own cause. Never has this been so easily highlighted than in recent seasons when referees have come under attack for not favouring Celtic during games; a ready-made excuse for the dribbling hordes to reference to explain the repeated failure of their increasingly desperate board and increasingly more ginger managers. The unholy union of press and Celtic has never been more solid and each and every Rangers fan must be aware of the potential consequences for our own quest for (further) superiority. This article is being written around the same time as Real Radio pollute the aural cavities of morons everywhere with their feckless phone-in: an organ which once addressed interesting football issues with a refreshing frankness is now reduced to a two-hour metaphorical blowjob of all things Celtic. Case in point is tonight’s programme, which featured “expert” opinion on whether Rangers’ penalties in the previous game were merited. No doubt they’ll conclude Inverness were robbed, Rangers players cheated and the league is tainted (again). This follows hot on the heels of BBC Scotland’s amateurish Sportscene programme, which, unsurprisingly to anyone familiar with the makeup of BBC Sport Scotland’s employees, was quick to dismiss all four (!) of our penalty claims and confidently predict from an unconvincing camera angle that our disallowed goal was “six inches” offside. How the Assistant Referee could tell that given he was five-feet behind play, was never explored. It would also be unfair to fail to mention The Sun’s own Andy Devlin, who managed to turn his match report into one long male menstruation as he bled real tears of indignation onto the page; only pausing to furiously bash one out to that picture of a Hooped Susan Boyle with her big fat belly hanging out (probably). Then again, not only does nobody take The Sun seriously, Andy Devlin is the same guy who said Kenny Miller was a big player for Rangers en route to Manchester, so one could understand - if not agree with - those suggesting he’s about as good a sports journalist as Gary Glitter is an English language teacher. One would be forgiven for suggesting decisions which favour Rangers are given far more air-time than those which, oh I dunno, favour the media’s favourite side? Only hours after Rangers triumphed in the Highlands, Celtic beat Dundee United 5-1. The match was refereed by Craig Thomson, one of those confirmed ‘St Mirren’ fans referenced in the opening paragraphs. Thomson denied Dundee United a penalty, which if awarded and subsequently scored, would have tied the game at 2-2 in the second half. TV replays confirmed this was a clear penalty kick and Thomson had conspired to miss it, but the level of analysis offered to this latest gaffe paled in comparison to that which was lavished on Rangers earlier in the day. Rewind to last season’s League Cup Final and we’ll be reminded of Craig Thomson’s unique gift for favouring Celtic with little to no reprimand. Jelavic burst into the penalty box and was clipped on the knee by the studs of some forehead-heavy malefactor in Hoops. Thomson, probably forgetting his remit for a moment, immediately pointed to the spot as further Hooped-horrors surrounded him, screaming in his face. The correct decision here would have been to book the wailing baseborns flobbing in his face, instead, he remarkably changed his mind and booked the Rangers player for diving. He held up his hand in an apologetic gesture to the green and white underclass. Later, he would claim in the press he didn’t point to the spot at all; the clear TV evidence showing he did was never flagged up by a compliant media. What is perhaps more astonishing is the lack of response over his pathetic ‘mind changing’. Celtic fans take great delight in telling us they had a referee sacked for changing his mind in respect of a penalty awarded to their team. Here we are, only months after that headline incident, and we are facing exactly the same scenario with Rangers in the spotlight, and it is instead glossed over and never mentioned again! Later in the same game, Mo Edu played a ball into the box which was deftly flicked away via the forearm of Mark Wilson. The cameras showed referee Thomson to be glaring straight at the incident but he simply waved play on, choosing to ignore what would have been an easy decision in favour of Rangers. No criticism was aimed at Thomson, from what I could read of the rudimentary doodling on the pages of Scotland’s sports press. Later in the same game, Father of the Year Mulgrew took down Jelavic whilst clean through on goal. In terms of ‘denying an obvious goalscoring opportunity (Law 12)’ is was as clear a decision as any referee could hope for but, again, Thomson decided to bend the rules to suit Celtic and only a yellow card was awarded, giving them maximum chance of rescuing the game. That Rangers managed to win that game and lift the cup is quite staggering given the woeful performance of a referee whose continual genuine mistakes favoured the same side over and over again. Thereafter we can cite the final Old Firm game of last season, where the horrible Stokes threw himself into Steven Davis in the box. Thomson (him again) pointed to the spot as even Davie Provan (!!!) conceded he’d got it completely wrong. Again. He failed to point out that of all the recent mistakes Thomson has made, only one team continually benefited. Again the Scottish press were as good as unanimous in their silence, instead reserving praise for Neil Lennon taking to the field to taunt the opposition. Of course, Lennon ended up a loser as we waggled a victorious phallus in his pretty face but that’s not the point. For the umpteenth time we’d seen decisions awarded incorrectly in favour of Celtic. That season Celtic would break the British record for penalties awarded in one season, yet the more deluded amongst their number still deduce they aren’t favoured by the officials. Thankfully it is easy to tune into the nasal warbling of the wider Celtic support. One particular unemployed Scotsman living in Ireland serves as a handy conduit into the minds of the permanently-challenged. One cannot mention Celtic and phalluses in the same article without referencing the discredited journalist. I’ve enjoyed some Twitter back and forth with him and what strikes me more than anything is that he genuinely believes he’s completely even-handed. Whether this is a very clever act or a bona fide personality issue is unclear, but every Rangers fan would do well to remember his gleeful boasting over the role he played in getting Rangers ‘done’ by UEFA, then contrasting it to his sudden lethargy and deflection when presented with recent instances of Celtic supporters indulging in offensive songs or displaying pro-IRA banners out of stapled-together (Tesco value) bin-bags. It’s a convenient juncture for him to grow weary of the sectarian debate as the team managed by his good friend becomes more blatant in their deviant promotion of sectarian murder gangs. Anyone with a modicum of education (and GS isn’t daft, despite what his haircut suggests) can tell what the Celtic crowd are trying to promote with their displays. The lack of condemnation - in stark contrast to that which was, correctly at times, aimed at the Rangers support - tells its own story. But what does all this mean for us? Well, we’re going to have to work harder than anyone else to achieve results. Frankly, it’s not worth a referee’s time to give a big decision in favour of Rangers as he’ll be hounded by the puppets in the press until it is ingrained on the collective subconscious that he’s just a ‘h** wi’ a whistle’. Craig Thomson’s flagrant favouring of Celtic may be a conscious decision by him based on personal preferences; equally it could be a subconscious reaction to the thought of the coverage which would be directed his way should he deny Celtic a decision. Either way, Nacho Novo’s book tells us the players in the Rangers dressing room are acutely aware of this nasty little phenomenon so we can hope that, much like last season, good eventually triumphs over the skid-marked tactics of evil.  

Source: FOOTYMAD