Source: Daily_Mail
The horrors of Hillsborough: 'The pitch looked like a battlefield'
When the call came through for an ambulance, we were told there had been a fatality at the ground, so we knew there was some urgency to get there as quickly as we could.
Of course, we had no idea, no inkling of what we were heading for. When we got to the ground, we were stopped by a policeman, who said we couldn't go any further because fans were fighting.
He was soon overruled by a senior ambulanceman, who told us to get our ambulance on the pitch and do whatever we could to help.
Fighting? I couldn't believe he had said that. The only fighting going on was to stay alive. I couldn't quite take in the scene we had driven into.
It was like a battlefield, people everywhere. Some trying to help, some
beyond help.
The noise of people shouting and crying filled the ground, but, above it, I could still hear banging on the sides of the ambulance as people screamed for help. What could I do? If you are called to a specific incident and someone needs emergency treatment or rushing to A and E, you do it. But this was different.
There were bodies on stretchers or advertising boards and others being given mouth-to-mouth resuscitation. There were people everywhere, and I didn't know which way to turn. Ours was the only ambulance on the pitch, and as I looked round at the fear and panic on so many faces, I felt helpless.
Twenty years on the emotions surrounding the disaster are as strong as ever. We did what we could, then left. There were 44 other ambulances lined up outside the ground, but they were not allowed in.
Twenty years on, I still can't get those images out of my mind. I still ask myself why. I tried to get on with my life but found I couldn't cope. The only solution was to get away from the Sheffield area, and I moved to the Isle of Bute, just to escape.
That helped, but with the anniversary approaching and people asking me what happened, it is all coming back.
The memories are so awful, so distressing that it is destroying me all over again.
