Source: FOOTYMAD
New Signing To Brighton Up Imps Relegation Run In.
LCM announce a new signing to superglue those Sincil smiles. With Brighton set to become League 1 Champions at Walsall today we thought we would take a leaf out of their book and brighten most Imps days with an exclusive signing from a South Coast University. LCM have broken the bank to make this deal happen and this one is top draw, right from the oracle of optimism itself. We give you DR Drone, Dr Sincil Drone the man who put the word Good into morning and Day. Vic, as usual addled with joice asked him to say a few words as the two journalists shared the remains of last nights kebab. We are all heart at caring sharing LCM Towers. Remember drink responsibly and enjoy a balanced diet. (Vic suggests iron in the morning - 2 Guiness to start the day and he will always have salad on his Donner whether she likes it or not) Good Day Imps, my name is DR Sincil Drone, Professor of Optimism at the University of Life. Worried about games against Crewe, Bury and Cheltenham? Well fear not for we may lose the first two but the Cherries are ripe for picking and Aldershot at home on the last day will at least give us a decent crowd! Stick with me and believe me you can put a positive spin on absolutely anything. So come on Imps, shine those horns and pierce that storm cloud above your head. You don’t know until you try and with Easter just around the corner there must be hundreds of mini eggs and cream eggs inside. So please email your Imps problems to the editor and Mark them for Dr Drone’s attention………………. Why here is one we prepared earlier, so chocs away chaps.. Echoman: With Grimes suspended and missing for the vital away games at Crewe and Bury shouldn’t we be worried DR Drone Oh come come you pessimistic fellow, fear not he will be fit and raring to go for Cheltenham That is a game we will win with the goal machine banging in a brace I would venture. Gonecarman With no money and no ambition how can we expect managers to keep polishing turds? DR Drone I would sprinkle glitter with perhaps a couple of squirts of Lynx to paper over the cracks and get rid of that awful smell currently coming from Impdom. I would suggest a plug for your nose Gonecarman and a pair of my new beer goggles featured below. As Mad dog says – you’ve got to pay the bills………. So now it is time for a word from our sponsors, yes a wee on-line plug Over the next couple of weeks we will be supplying a range of beer goggles at only £1.99 with a mere £25 postage and packing. Their will be 4 unique styles although all will have my trademark rose tinted lenses for guaranteed satisfaction.
