Alternate 2014 FIFA World Cup awards, starring Fred, Neuer, Rodriguez and more

15 July 2014 14:02

Best Player

Contenders:

James Rodriguez, Thomas Muller, Arjen Robben, Manuel Neuer, Neymar

The Analysis:

For me, it’s a really close call between James Rodriguez and Manuel Neuer. Clearly Rodriguez has shown the world what a talent he is and surely, with the correct career path, will go on to be. However, Neuer has been a machine. The new age ‘sweeper keeper’ has been on top of his game with some amazing shot stopping and confidence supreme.

The Winner:

Maybe controversially, Manuel Neuer

Best Team

Contenders:

Columbia, Germany, Costa Rica, The Netherlands

The Analysis:

Columbia gelled together well but possibly relied a little too heavily on James/Hames/Zamezh Rodriguez. Costa Rica were the surprise package of the tournament and overachieved massively and kind of ended up waiting to see if Joel Campbell could smack one of his 850 shots from 30 yards plus in. The Dutch started strongly and petered out towards the end. Germany…..the machine was oiled!

The Winner:

Germany

Best Game

Contenders:

Netherlands V Spain, Portugal V USA, Germany V Brazil

The Analysis:

Probably wasted on this category. I think we all know where it’s headed!

The Winner:

Germany 7 – Brazil 1

Best Goal

Contenders:

Tim Cahill v Netherlands, James Rodriguez v Uruguay, Robin Van Persie V Spain, David Luiz V Columbia

The Analysis:

Tim Cahill’s perfectly executed volley was a truly stunning effort and display of technique. James Rodriguez’s little peek at the goalie, chest down and volley on the turn was magnificent on three levels of skill, RVP’s superman header must have left him with a crick in his neck? David Luiz, using the ‘knuckle’ technique of striking a dead ball put more wiggle and curve about than a belly dancer covered in itching powder.

The Winner:

For me, for the fact he had to take a quick peek, chest it down and execute the volley, James Rodriguez just pips Tim to the finish.

Worst Player

I was going to pop Luis Suarez straight in just for his stupidity and inability to keep his teeth to himself. Then I thought that was unfair on Fred. So I created a category just for Fred. Then I thought it was unfair on Marouane Fellaini. Then I thought it was unfair on Kevin Price Boateng. Then I found myself starting to compile a list of approximately 65% of the entire World Cup roster.

The Analysis:

Didn’t bother.

Winner:

Luis Suarez

The Sherlock Award

This award is given to the player who provided the most intrigue, the most mystery, the biggest wonderment as why there were even there.

The contenders

Fred

The Analysis

Ummm…..*whistles*….dum de dum…..

The Winner

Fred

Source: DSG