Elevenses - The Simple Cash Solution to Selection-Gate
Published: 12 Nov 2010 - 10:49:40
Anybody else sick and tired of the 'did they put out their strongest team' debate? Elevenses is beyond bored of the recycling of polls and inane columns flooding the media and ready to act.
The fuel this week was provided by the Blackpool team Ian Holloway sent out against Aston Villa. Blackpool lost and Holloway said he'd resign if the FA brought charges.
Firstly Elevenses doesn't believe Holloway as far as the Blackpool boss could kick us. He might not be as pretty, but his ego's as big as Mourinho's and he won't be leaving the Premier League before he's told to.
Secondly, it's Blackpool - to whom Premier League survival is arguably the only thing worth fighting for. If they want to juggle a 25-man squad in an attempt to get maximum points, good luck to them.
And if they lose 8-1 to West Ham at the weekend we can all have a little chuckle to ourselves.
On a more serious note, Elevenses has devised a solution to the problem. With our scheme in place no side will ever risk sending out an under-strength side again - not even in the Carling Cup.
What we do is introduce random cash prizes for random games. These will be kept secret until the end of every week, whereupon Noel Edmonds will reveal on a box-by-box basis how much every game was worth.
So...while West Brom could win £16 million for beating Crawley Town in the FA Cup, Chelsea could be handed just £3.50 for an away win against Arsenal in the Premier League.
With that kind of money in the equation, Elevenses would suggest not even Arsene Wenger would risk fielding a weakened team
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- Elevenses is a high-energy performer who bites at the ankles of football and is not afraid to put a boot in. If it’s in the game, it’s fair game. Unsurprisingly Elevenses is served at 11am every weekday morning. So come and join us for a cup full of opinion and hilarity, and don’t be shy if you’ve got a story you think we should cover.
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