Barry the Pro - Danny Rose may as well retire
Published: 15 Apr 2010 - 07:53:27
1. What a strike that is.
2. Oh, that's a belter.
3. That's a contender for goal of the season.
4. **** me! ****ing hell, what a ****ing goal.
5. Are you kidding me? What a play from freshman Danny Rose! He hit that sweeter than a quarterback hits a cheerleader on prom night.
In case you were wondering, five is for the benefit of our American cousins. It's also my favourite option from the five and I'll be trotting it out every half an hour or so today.
Anyway, back to Rose's goal. On his full debut. Against the Arsenal. For the Spurs. Legend.
Everybody who's played football will have tried a blockbuster like that at least once. The ball's hanging in the air and for a crazy moment you forget you're not Lionel Messi and boom one from 35 yards.
The result is ALWAYS humiliating. It's like finding the nerve to ask out the best looking girl at school, only to be turned down in front of all your mates and then realising you forgot to put your trousers on.
Even for Rose, the odds were very long when he sized that one up last night. That ball could have gone out for a throw-in.
As it turns out, he creamed it into the roof of the net and scored the best goal of his life...in the most important game he's ever played in. Things just don't get any better, and he really should think about retiring.
The problem for Rose now is he'll never live up to that goal. Fans will be waiting for something like that every time he puts on a shirt, and it just won't happen for the lad. He's peaked way to early.
If I was Danny Rose I'd snag myself a decent Wag while the going's good and negotiate a 10-year contract pronto.
- - -
Nag's got done 5-1 on Sunday in a tasty local derby against the Queen's Head.
'Lepper' got sent off after 10 minutes for a three-footed tackle (there was an arm in there too) and we never really recovered.
No idea why the call him lepper, but apparently it's a nickname coined by at least three of his ex-girlfriends.
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- FOOTBALL.CO.UK BLOGGER:barry the pro
- 'Bazza' lives, breathes and dies football every day of his life, before waking up the next morning to do it all over again. On the pitch his penchant for flowery flicks and tricks tends to frustrate his team-mates at Olympiacos Nag's Head FC, but all is forgiven when he shares his generous supply of male grooming products in the showers. BTP drinks lager and lime and has dedicated his life to scoring from the halfway line. Read him on Thursdays.
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- Typical Germans win football matches
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- My England starting XI for the World Cup
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