There's been a lot of silly talk about Celtic and Rangers heading south to join the Premier League recently, but me and the boys had a relevation yesterday. How about sending Liverpool in the opposite direction?
Granted, we'd all been on the football juice down the Nag's Head, but when you think about it, it makes perfect sense.
First of all, Liverpool fans are desperate for a league title. The last time they did it in England, they had Barry Venison at the back, Jan Molby in midfield and Kenny Dalglish up top.
If that doesn't mean a lot to you, try this. The number one singles that season included 'Hangin Tough' by New Kids on the Block and 'Vogue' by Madonna. Still struggling? Accrington Stanley? Exactly.
Twenty years have passed through the Anfield tunnel since, with most of them spent watching their arch rivals Moneychester United fill their cabinet with shiny trophies.
But with one simple move north, the Reds would be pretty much guaranteed an immediate return. Titles would flow like Irn Bru and Rafa Benitez could become a hero again. The whining on Merseyside would finally stop.
What's more, Liverpool would never have to worry about getting into the Champions League again. And when they got there, they could afford to rest Stevie G and Torres against everyone bar Rangers and Celtic in the league, and simply save them for the Big Cup.
Also, there's always been a special relationship between Liverpool and Celtic, so why not have the two playing each other four times a season? Now there's a football love-in to make the game a better place.
Am I crazy, or is this the only way forward?
Before I go, I should tell you we won 7-3 on Sunday. It was liquid football. Actually, it was more like gas. 'Leper' Johnson got three headers from left midfield and won man of the match.
They call him leper because he doesn't have a left foot.or a right foot.or a brain.
READ BARRY THE PRO EXCLUSIVELY AT FOOTBALL.CO.UK EVERY THURSDAY